DEFEND YOUR MOVES 2025 WEEK 6!!!!!!

Defend Your Moves
Oct 9
7 min read

WE ARE SOOO BACK!!!!!

What's up Special Ed?!

Feels good to get back into the weekly blog grind. We got the battery in our backs last week and it wasn't just the Hall of Shame induction, we just got amped to do DYM in general. Amped to get back to being fuckin good at fantasy too. Just run shit. We've always said that Defend Your Moves makes all of you guys better at fantasy, and the results from week 5 speak for themselves: There were some BARNBURNERS in Special Ed. Every winning team in Special Ed scored over 120 and the matchup of Erin Ertz vs. Tobin & The Rippers had over 300 total points which is just fuckin awesome. Love to see it. We are ALL back.

LETS GO WIN A NOBEL PRIZE!!!!!

The Nobel Prizes are being awarded this week and once again Defend Your Moves was not nominated. It's a shame really. This is the best website ever.

It's important to realize that the Nobel Prize in Literature is awarded to authors based on their entire body of work as a whole.

Cause while we have many individual pieces that are award-worthy, like CJ or Defend Your Moves 2019 Week 11, our body is bangin' altogether. DYM is the Jamie Lee Curtis of writing corpora. Little rough on the face, but undeniably BANGIN body. We did a little reading in the DYM Archives last weekend and, man. Tellin you guys. We can fuckin WRITE. This shit is really good, and its been this good for almost a decade. And if we're being honest, the old off-season shit was probably right in these philosophy nerds' wheelhouse.

It's aight tho. There's always next year.

And we got a plan.

The main obstacle to us winning a Nobel Prize is that we're not very notable. And that seems unlikely to change any time soon. So we did a little digging and figured out how the nomination process works. Turns out there's a select number of folks who are allowed to submit nominations, and most of them are Swedish. The key for us is that any previous winner of the Nobel Prize can submit nominees -- that's pretty much the only way we can be nominated by an American reader.

We figure if we can get one or two Nobel Laureates to join the Special Ed League then they'll read this blog every week and be like "Yo. This guy can fuckin WRITE." then they'll nominate us then the Swedish dudes'll be like "The fuck is this shit?" then they'll read CJ and be like "Ohhhh shit, son. This fuckin guy can WRITE!!!!!"

We went to wikipedia and looked up some recent winners. There's 18 living Nobel Laureates, and only four of them write in English, and only one is American and its Bob Dylan. Oof. It sucks that we didn't think of this earlier. We did not realize that Gabriel Garcia Marquez and Toni Morrison are already dead, they woulda been our top two picks. Also, interesting to note that Bob Dylan is the only living Jewish Laureate, which is unusual in the history of Nobels -- 22% of all Nobel winners all-time are Jewish, so we're due. Here's the top 5 living Nobel Laureates that we think might be good at fantasy:

Kazuo Ishiguro's parents apparently were oceanographers which is pretty cool. Maybe he's down with our new Bigflipper theory.
Bob Dylan is a lock. We gotta get Dylan.
Wole Soyinka has a hilarious name and great haircut
Svetlana Alexievich was awarded "for her polyphonic writings, a monument to suffering and courage in our time" and we have no clue what that means.
Abdulrazak Gurnah is a mouthful. We'll probably call him "Zak".

Now, none of these guys have any mention of football or any other sport in their wikipedia pages, so we're really just basing this ranking on how cool they look in their headshots and all the rest of them guys look like nerds and assholes if we're being honest.

Alls we gotta do is get in touch with Bob Dylan and tell him we're gonna make Special Ed a 12-man league. If Wole or Zak want in too that's great, otherwise we'll get Andy's brother to be the 12th. Either way Bob is the key, if we can just get Bob Dylan reading DYM then we'll definitely win a Nobel next year.

New CJ coming soon. Its gonna be a banger.

FOOD BEEF: TACOS!!!!!!

Central Taqueria - Morristown, NJ

As the name suggests Central Taqueria is located right in the fuckin middle of downtown Morristown, which means that even though it’s not far it takes forever to get to and you can’t park anywhere nearby at dinner time.

We had these rib-eye tacos that were good, not great. They checked a lotta boxes (sturdy tortilla, fresh cilantro, and onion) but the flavor didn’t blow us away. The hot sauce selection is limited to “mild, hot or extra hot” and they all seem to be chipotle 🤷‍♂️. This is what the kids would call “mid”. Can’t see it being lower than a 7.5 and no higher than an 8.

We also got the black bean soup, rice, and guacamole all were equally unimpressive. When asked for comment the wife said "It's a place you can go🤷‍♀️"

So there you have it. Tacos - 7.5 Sopa - 7.5

TOTAL SCORE: 7.5

NOBEL UPDATE:

They gave the Nobel to László Krasznahorkai this morning. László marks a return to form for the Swedish Academy. He's the archetypal Nobel Laureate in that he's both Jewish and ugly as shit. His 2019 novel Chasing Homer was described as "a cross between a Jean-Claude Van Damme film and the works Franz Kafka" (Publishers Weekly).

We also understand that some of his books were made into movies. We think he mighta wrote Kickboxer but we could be wrong. He's moving into the Top 5. Congrats, Laszlo, your Special Ed invitation is in the mail!!!

AMERICAS GAME OF THE WEEK!!!!!!

BIGFLIPPERS vs Blame the ceiling

ITS A GOLF BUDDIES MATCHUP FOR WEEK 6 LETS GOOO!!!!!!

Yahoo put Blame the Ceiling in the Game of the Week two weeks in a row. That's something we generally tried not to do unless something special was happening. Fortunately Yahoo tracks everything we do on our phone so they knew we were trying to get a round with Andy this weekend. Don't know if the weather's gonna cooperate but we'll see!!!!!!

BTC has been extremely consistent this season with a low score of 118 and a high of 125. Last week they went and got that Indiana Jones at QB, a very serviceable replacement. But as long as they're playing without Lamar their ceiling is gonna be kinda low. This week Justin Jefferson is on bye so theyre rolling with an all over-30 WR room - Diggs, Davante and Keenan Allen - if we were them we'd slide DJ Moore into the flex to complete the set. Team DYM has no players on bye but we lost Omarion Hampton last week. Omarion started out slow the first couple weeks but caught fire since week 3. It sucks, but he'll be back before the playoffs. We're not worried tho, all our teams this year have at least 2 rookie RBs cause ya never know. So we're looking for RJ Harvey to run out the garbage time against the Jets in London this week.

Generally we don't like having a lotta guys playing in Europe games or on Thursdays cause it fucks up their biological clocks. But we're starting at least 2 Broncos and Saquon against the Giants tonight - because they're ALL greenlight matchups on Yahoo.

BIGFLIPPERS WINS!!!!!

BIGFLIPPERS - 133.19

BLAME THE CEILING - 120.00

SPECIAL ED MATCHUPS!!!!!!

Uncle Rico's Revenge vs Paul's Phenomenal Team

Paul is 1-4 and its not looking good. We hope it can work out for them cause we have a Dak+Pickens team in the other league. Just today Paul picked up Kendrick Bourne and got him running with the ones in practice over Jameson Williams. That's sad. You know Jamo isn't gonna be good every week. Sometimes he's gonna be AMAZING but you never know when that's gonna be. So we say if you got him you just gotta start him every week and roll the dice . Early congrats to Uncle Rico on their DYM Award for BEST DRAFT VALUE. Quentin Johnston is the best WR in football.

UNCLE RICOS REVENGE WINS!!!!!!

Always Be Chimpin' vs Erin Ertz

Erin Ertz has only 2 starters playing at 1pm EST on Sunday. That's wild, this NFL scheduling is out of control. They must be stopped.

ERIN ERTZ WINS!!!!!!

I ❤️ Auntie Cynthula vs The Hamburglars

Don't know what happened to iHeart Auntie Cynthula. Guess the Presidential Fitness Challenge took a lot out of them cause, damn. They stink. Maybe Chase turns it around now that he's got Flacco but... damn.

THE HAMBURGLARS WINS!!!!!!

Tobin & The Rippers vs dead-on footballs accurate 🤌

Sometimes when we're making small talk with people they say something like "what shows you watchin right now?" and we fuckin freeze. Cold sweat, thousand yard stare. Then after a while we'll say something like "ah we just watch NBA league pass." The fact is there aren't any good shows on TV or streamers right now and our favorite show is on YouTube -- Neural Viz!!!

Neural Viz is the fuckin WEIRDEST. Its triggering and off-putting and we fuckin love it.

It's a bunch of fake TV shows from some future where humans are extinct and these guys called "Glurons" inhabit the Earth. (a lotta people will off-handedly say that the Glurons are "aliens" but they're NOT!!! It's never aliens.™️). It's all AI videos so they're totally creepy to watch but we like how they let the bot do weird shit then just leave it in the final cut and build around it after. There's a meta-commentary on AI content in there somewhere, we believe.

It's the shit tho, honestly. Big shout out to Neural Viz.