MISS CLEOS 2022 NFL PLAYER FUTURES!!!
Miss Cleo is BACK!!!!!
We made an ALL NEW Fantasy Football Tarot card deck for the 2022 season and it is fucking BEAUTIFUL!!!!!
Once again, Miss Cleo has identified the 78 most archetypally significant fantasy football players for this season and handcrafted an original tarot card deck to help the entire DYM Nation dominate in fantasy and CASHOUT at the sportsbook.
Once the season gets underway Miss Cleo will pick her PLAYER OF THE WEEK every week as part of our regular weekly coverage right here on DYM. Last year Miss Cleo's Prop Bets were an unqualified success - going 13-8 (62%) on the season. So this year we're getting the action started a little early with some off-season futures market wagers.
Thanks to the new relaxed keeper rules EVERYBODY in Special Ed has an eligible Keeper going into the 2022 season. Three teams (PHP, BIOH, and Team Meh) actually have interesting keeper choices to make.
Fortunately Miss Cleo is still in town. We’ll use that NEW 2022 Fantasy Football Tarot deck to help them narrow down those choices and rank all the keeper values across the league.
2022 SPECIAL ED KEEPER RANKING!!!!!
#10: Rob - Tyler Bass (13th)
Obviously we love Bass. He’s our #1 kicker going into this season and 13th round is as cheap as it gets. But it’s still just a kicker tho, just hard to get that excited about a keeper kicker.
#9: Matt - Brady (9th) OR Cooks (10th)
Cooks is obviously the better value. He’s got a 6th round ADP at the moment. If Matt’s got any compunction about it he can go grab that Brady passing yards future for +700.
#8: Doug - Kenny Golladay 😂 (9) OR
Joe Burrow (10)
Burrow is a decent value here. He should be drafted in like the 6th or 7th, and although we generally don’t love mid-round QBs - we’d put him at the top of the second QB tier so he’s got some upside too. Its probly worthwhile to lock that guy in.
#7 Kull - Devonta Smith (8th)
Devonta is a perfectly cromulent keeper. But the 8th is only about 1 round later than where he’s being drafted right now. There’s a few other 7th round ADP -level keepers (Hurts, Mooney, Pittman) but theyre all gonna be kept in the 11th round or later.
#6: DYM - Darnell Mooney (11th)
We love Mooney, especially now that he’s the WR1 in Chicago with boring ass Allen Robinson gone. We wanna love Justin Fields but he might be the worst QB attached to a keeper WR in this league. 11th round is still amazing value tho.
#5: Dave - Mike Pittman (11th)
Ya never know tho, there’s a chance Fields takes a step forward this year and actually plays better than Matt Ryan. But even washed Matt Ryan is probly better than Wentz.
#4: Mike - AJ Dillon (10th) OR Jalen Hurts (13)
This is a very tough choice, both are GREAT values. They’re both around late 6th-early 7th rounders. So mathematically, Hurts in the 13th looks better. But Dillon‘s ceiling seems higher if everything breaks right. It seems somewhat more likely that Dillon ends up as a top 10 RB than that Hurts is a top 3 QB.
#3: Andy - Justin Tucker🐐(13th) OR Matt Stanford (8) OR Mark Andrews (9) OR Lenny Fournette (10)
Stafford in the 8th is not great value, and Tucker is still a kicker. So the choice comes down to either the tight end you can only play in the flex, or the RB that’s going on 28years old. Yuck. MAndrews actually finished 5th in receiving yards last year with 1,371 yds on 107 recs. And he could get even more opportunities this year with Hollywood gone. Gotta just hold your nose and keep the TE.
#2: Paul - Deebo Samuel (10th)
Based on last year’s numbers Deebo in the 10th should have been the #1 keeper in this league. He had as many total touchdowns as Chase and about 300 more yards. But he’s probably got a new QB and you never really know who’s gonna get those excess rushing yards in the Shanahanigans system. We’re gonna be looking for Tyrion Davis-Price in the late rounds tbh.
#1: Tobin - Jamarr Chase (8th)
Last year Chase was the only WR in the top 25 in YAC/R (8yds) and ADOT (12.6y). He had 200 more yards and 4 more TDs than Tyreek Hill on 30 FEWER targets. And he just turned 22 this spring. Absolutely insane.